The Angry Czeck

DAD: Enjoy your waffles, children!

KIDS: MMMMM!

YOUNGEST: Dad! There’s a spider on the wall.

<pause>

YOUNGEST: Dad! There’s a spider –

DAD: Just pretend you don’t see it.

ELDEST: You must be really scared. Why aren’t you screaming?

DAD: I am. On the inside. Eat your waffles.

YOUNGEST: There’s a spider on the wall!

ELDEST: I’ll kill it!

DAD: With what?

ELDEST: With my fork!

DAD: Are you crazy? Here, use a paper towel.

ELDEST: Got it! Wait. Nope. I just got two legs.

DAD: WHAAAT?

ELDEST: See? They’re twitching.

DAD: Where’s the rest of it?

ELDEST: It flew away.

DAD: ….spiders don’t fly, son.

ELDEST: This one did.

DAD: We have to leave this house.

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